Mommy Life and the continual “Artist Struggle”
I’m sitting here on a Wednesday morning in my pj’s, on the couch, sipping a warm cup of coffee, with my 2 year old son watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and playing with his IKEA train set. And of course- on my laptop writing this blog and ceremoniously checking emails and trying to “Get ahead”, brainstorm, and create/record music.
Life is such an interesting journey. My son is the most important person in my life, and I just love him so much. Part of me wants to get on the ground and play with him (which I often do) but part of me wants to stay right here just so grateful that he’s now playing by himself and I can get a little work done!
I find everyday a tedious balance between getting work done I need to get done, songwriting, recording, teaching music, personal bible study time and prayer time, working out, eating healthy, housework (that’s at the end of my list on purpose!lol), etc etc- and then somedays we just say WHATEVER and get in the car and go to a park, see horses at the local stables, get a coffee to go (for me, not for him…well, ok he does ask for a sip!)
Being an independent musician and also a “Stay at home” mom is such a funny thing. The whole independent “artist” thing can be TOTALLY consuming, especially with the internet! There’s always another song you could write, another email you could send, another phone call you could make, etc etc etc..AHHHHHHH.
Having a child has actually brought more balance, not to talk about love, fun, my heart being full everyday- to my life! I think it’s helped me take the time to do the things I need to do to help provide for my family, as well as say no to things, I probably should’ve said no to before (unpaid gigs, stupid meetings with people who say they’re something but not that I should’ve researched, and so on and so forth), but because I didn’t have my precious little one at home and a loving husband- I just did those things because I could.
So, now I have to make very exact lists of what do with my time, when I actually get the time. Specific calls to make to booking agents, venues that PAY, managers, and all sorts of industry folk that I need to speak with to get ahead. But now, when the little guys are sleeping, I make my lists for the next day, copy and paste the numbers and emails I need to call the next day into my calendar. I think I’ve actually gotten it TOGETHER!
When I go out for a gig, I have a suitcase I roll that’s loaded with everything I’ll need from merchandise, to cables, mics, and a baggie of things I may need like black tape, bungee cords, scissors, markers, and lots of other goodies! It’s not that I never had those things in my gig bag before- but now they’re all in one little place and I’ve finally organized! I can’t tell you how much easier it makes my gigging life!
On top of that for gigs I have to take a sound system to (which is most of them), I also have a rock-n-roller cart- this thing is MY BEST FRIEND at gigs, and better than my best friend in the sense that it can hold up to 1000 lbs! lol. (although there’s nothing like a best friend at a gig, because although they can’t carry as much in one load as my cart, they can carry me through a lame gig where no one shows up or claps!lol). So seriously, if you’re a gigging, or want to be gigging musician- you NEED this cart! Best $100 I ever spent!
So, I’ve actually gotten all this stuff together since having my adorable 2 year old son and buddy! So although I definitely have less time on my hands to do my music stuff, when I do do my music stuff (don’t you love saying do do as a mommy), I think I do do it better (twice in one sentence- that’s amazing!).lol
On top of all that, I will say that sometimes in the past I was a bit flakey as a music teacher. I would cancel, even if it was legit, but parents would get frustrated. Now that I am a parent, I totally understand why! So being a mommy has really helped me be more consistent in that aspect as well. You now understand what moms and dads have to go through just to get a kid, let alone any other kids in the car with them, home, let alone to an appointment!
Well, I better get back to checking emails and changing the video on the TV to Handy Manny so that Weston keeps playing! :) Well he’s on my lap. No more time to write! :) But it’s ok, he’s sitting on my lap and just leaned in to kiss me! :)
I’ll leave you with a video of exactly what it’s like to try to get a video recorded while home with the little guy! (Note: I jut redid my music studio and it’s now video friendly not the mess in this clip)
Tour Diary Day One Sept. 21st, 2010
Ok, So as promised I’m writing my day one of my tour diary. Mainly today was a lot of driving. We got up around 5 a.m. and kissed my hubby goodbye and then got my mom and son up to finish packing the car. And when I say packing, boy do I mean PACKING. Because that’s the only way everything was going to fit!
So, we did it and there was one brief second when we were packed in my car like sardines that I thought about calling and cancelling and the thought “Who said this was a good idea?” went through my head. Mainly, it was also the lack of sleep and the stress of a big trip with my mother and a 2 year old!
So off we went! Down the street to Coffee Bean! Like we were going to start this trip without our favorite coffee! Yum yum! And then…off we really went….
Next stop…Flagstaff, AZ!!! Well, we stopped a few times along the way for food, and some walk time, but finally made it to Flagstaff at 4 p.m. Mom and I crashed and took turns watching West while we napped. Then we took an awesome trip walking across the street to Wal Mart! Woo hoo. As if we needed anything else…
Smelling the fresh air here in Flagstaff is enough to make me want to move from my beautiful sunny CA stat! But I won’t, yet at least! :) We took a nice long walk around and just breathed in the pine tree air.
Tomorrow morning, first stop (after coffee) GRAND CANYON!!! I’ll probably write a more detailed and funny tour diary after- like a fun wrap up- but I’m so exhausted right now this is all I can do.
Mother’s Day Funny Stories…
Ok, so I promised my sister I’d write this story down so we’d always remember it. Might as well share it with the world while putting it in a place I won’t forget- the internet! :)
So, yesterday was Mother’s Day and the day was off to a great start. My hubby brought me breakfast in bed and had gone out and bought me my favorite cup of coffee from Starbucks as well as a Starbucks gift card..ahhhh. :) So sweet.
Then, we all went to church together which was wonderful as usual. After Church, us girls (mom, sister, and me) decided it was time to get pampered. Out where my sis/parents live there’s not as many “nice” pedicure places as Orange County so we were looking on the internet trying to find a decent place. So, we called around, and decided to test our luck in Banning at a seemingly decent nail salon.
So, we drove out to Banning (my mom had to go to the Walmart there after) and found the nail salon very easily- we were so excited to get out of the car and pick out our nail color. Then we walked in and stood and stared. The people who were going to be doing our nails were young, college aged boys who looked a little like Viatnamese boy models. They had their masks on and started running the water- NO JOKE. So, I was like, “Whatever” and started picking out my color.
Well, then, my mom and sister started whispering things along the lines of “I don’t want these hot boys buffing my toe-nails,” and “And THEY’RE massaging my legs?” lol…ok- so then I started thinking about how it was MY mother’s day (and my mom’s of course) and I knew I also felt a little uncomfortable with the idea of these male models trimming my cuticles- and how could I really relax while they massaged my feet and calves?
As mom and my sister kept frantically whispering, the lady at the table (no, she of course wouldn’t be helping us- just sitting there) kept saying “they’re ready, they’re read” and we’re like “Just a minute”.
I could see where this was going. As I kept picking out my color and putting it back, and having done that 3 times waiting for the conclusion of this little scene- I decided that was that. I was outta there! I put up my color and bolted through my mom and sister, and ran out of the front doors to the car and hid behind it, waiting for my mom and sister with the keys to hopefully follow my lead.
Well, they finally came running out as well and we were laughing our heads off, in a nervous and guilty way. How do you tell people “Sorry, you’re too hot to massage my leges, and I don’t think my husband or I would like it very much”. I finally ran when I thought in my head. “I only get one pedicure today, this is NOT how I’m going to get it.” lol.
So, we ended up finding the nicest pedicure place down the street that was brand new and had the best massage chairs and LADIES doing our feet EVER! :) So, we’ll definitely be going back- to THAT one.
Moral of the story: Before going to a pedicure place, perhaps ask if hot model boys will be doing the work, or the usual lovely ladies. ;) ha ha ha. And if any of you want to visit the model boy pedicure place- feel free to email me and I’ll give you the info. lol.
CSULB, Poetry, Goldfish, and Messy House
So, I’m writing this at 12:35 a.m. March 26th. I played a last minute show tonight at Cal State Long Beach’s Poet’s Lounge. It’s always such an interesting crowd and experience. The music (me and my cellist Irina tonight) start the show with a few songs and then they have featured poets as well as open mic poets. I find most of the poems to be extremely innapropriate- but some are pretty amazing. I also find myself very inspired because it gets my brain thinking in a different creative way. It really inspires me to write better lyrics and different perspectives. I really like it.
I was also pleasantly surprised because two of my dear friends came to surprise me and support us- even though it was really last minute and on a huge college campus- they walked like a mile to find us. Seriously, getting to this place, especially your first time feels like when Buddy the Elf from “Elf” tells his story about getting to NYC. It’s like “I walked through seven parking lots, and then realized I had walked the wrong way, but then a kind student steered me in the right direction past the fountains…” etc…etc… :)
So, all in all I had a really nice night. My cellist and friend, Irina is just AMAZING. If you’re around- you should really come out to see us play, I’m SOOO blessed with every band member- each one is also an artist themselves- so I’m so honored to have them!
I came home, then, and my baby and hubby are sleeping- but I can never go to sleep right away, no matter how exhausted. It’s like it always takes a couple hours to wind down and be ready to sleep. I also find I need to process every performance and that takes time.
I was sitting on the couch eating goldfish (thanks to my son for getting me into goldfish as an adult!) watching “Community” and just couldn’t take my dirty house any longer. So, I at least tidied up the kitchen, dining and living room. I could write a lot more about how the house is always messy with a baby around- it’s not even that he messes up that much (although he definitely does like things ‘out of place’) :) but it’s more, you’re so TIRED to really clean how you’d normally clean. Can I get an Amen from all you mommas and poppas…
Ok, well I’m going to start rambling (like I haven’t already) Hope you sleep well! I hope I sleep well!
